Today... on film

So, with my camera in for repair and me going through photo taking withdrawal I picked up my Nikon FE



and realized that there was still unused film in it. So, I picked up where I left off. I have used this camera (or it's twin that sadly died a few years ago - but that's another story) far longer than I have used my Nikon D40 by years. So it was not with much difficulty that I was able to start snapping again.
That being said, the very distinct mechanical sound startled me some and EVERY time I've taken a picture I've lowered the camera to look at the back of the camera as if I'd be able to see the photo I'd just taken.



It's been neat to pick up the camera again and look through it. A bigger brighter image through the viewfinder, in some ways easier to create the picture from the viewfinder, harder to tell if the setting I used where correct - as I still haven't finished the roll. When shooting digital I tend to take multiple exposures of the same scene. Sometimes 8 or more. With the FE, think it through and 'click'. Wasn't even a thought. And my right thumb instinctively advancing the film like I never stopped using it.

Odd. I learned a great deal about the basics of photography with this camera, a gift from my Dad (thanks, again!), and yet I've learned that much and more about the art and passion that is picture taking. Digital caters to my impatience. Film seems to be catering to the romantic notion of pictures, although I must be careful not to shoot too much... it costs. Many of our photos we leave in the digital realm, using them here, flickr, facebook or email. Besides film costs money.

So, while I still love this little camera, I still want my D40 back!!! Oh, and that's why there's no new pictures up anywhere from me. Some are being taken, but it might be awhile before I even see them.

genuine

"Let's not imagine that we are hollow inside."


I read that in one of my books this week and copied it down. I'll leave where I found it out... as I'm sure to post more from this book soon. It's from the foreword of a classic I'm reading.

My camera is still away, totally unknown as to when it will return. I'm in a little bit of a weird space these days. I have had mixed feelings about my "performance" the last few weeks.

I have been very pleased with a few things and then there have been a few moments that stand in out in my mind as me totally making a mess of it. I have been trying to focus more on my devotional life - examining what I do, and why... seeing what's going on there. Trying to find meaning in things that I do and not doing them out of repetition or a sense of duty.

How have I done? Well, at first glance I'd say not as well as I'd like; but then, I have been truly struck with the love of God for me lately. My thankfulness has increased. And despite all the stuff that's been bouncing around my head and my life- when does life ever slow down? - I feel some peace. That peace comes only from God.

You know I used to kind of balk at people who would be a little "touchy feely" about God and about people sensing his presence and feeling his love and that kind of stuff, mostly because I tried at times to find that genuine emotional response in my own devotional life and it seemed that contrived emotions could be there, but sometimes it felt like a genuine continual sense of God's peace was hard to come by. Over time though I have sensed God move closer and closer to me. So, all that to say, you can balk at me saying "I feel at peace" all you want... I understand, I have been there.

Genuine. The picture of the word genuine is actually a picture of one of my sweatshirts. For my old Bible school friends, you may recognize it as old Youth Conference SWAG. I have always really liked the sweatshirt because it reminds me that I have to be real. Real with myself, real with my family and friends, and real with my God.

I think it's important to be genuine, to not fake it, to not sugar coat things, in my experience most people have a pretty good sense when you're being fake. In fact, I think usually I'd be the last person to know that everyone else knows I'm being fake (did that make sense?).

I mentioned my camera at the beginning of this post... you might wonder why... if you didn't... I'll tell you anyways. One of the things that I like about photography is that it makes me look at the world in a different way. It makes "see" things. The photographers that I really love, especially the ones who do event photography (weddings, graduations, whatever) is that they see moments that slip by most other people. They see a girl blowing bubbles in a crowd of graduates. Or maybe they see a portion of a person or animal that normally isn't seen and draw attention to it, an expression, or posture, of even the tranquillity of a certain space.

Photography is an attempt to capture the world, to slow it down, to see. You can fake beauty sometimes, you can fake a lot of things, but you can't fake a genuine moment. A moment where truth is revealed. Love, anger, fear, joy, sadness, desperation there are moments where those shine through.

A mentor of mine used to always say "time and truth go hand and hand". Meaning if you give it enough time, the truth will always come out. In my life I have seen that. Sometimes it takes a long time for the truth to come out, and even if you don't see it, God does. So in my way of thinking, being genuine is what I aim to do, I suppose I'll let others decide how well I'm doing at that... I can't tell - all I know is, I'm trying.

Art in the craziness that is our world

If you've been thinking about environmental issues at all recently you need to check out Chris Jordan's site. He's an artist and his work will stagger your mind.

I was looking at his "running the numbers" page. All I can say is "wow".
Scroll through as much as you can.

3 to 6 weeks

So I have bad news. One of my lenses for my Nikon D40 seems to be dead. It's under warranty, but it will take 3 - 6 weeks for the camera and lens to go and come back. That's right, I have to send the camera too. I just hope I get it back in time for our trip to Ottawa this summer. I feel a little like a friend is leaving for a vacation.

The other thing about the whole affair is we have to drive into the city. A 3 hour drive, oh well, some good quality time, maybe I'll make Tara drive and just take pictures with my other lens the entire way, I wonder how many pictures I could snap in a 3 hour drive at 2.5 pictures a second... (some of you have figured that out already), what would all those pictures look like in a collage? How big would that file be?!
We should get to see my brother and his wife though, I'm pumped to see him again.

Hope you have a wonderful Victoria day... I'm off to bed to get ready for it.

Public Service Announcement

For those who have followed things around here for awhile... I'm experimenting with a new way of getting pushing my pictures around the web.
If you see things get weird... don't worry, I'll try to fix things as we go.